30 Simple Steps to a Cool Camping Potato

August 15, 2016

Hey folks, if any of you are going on a camping trip soon then I'd like to offer you this cool little camping recipe, direct from my personal stash. It delivers deliciously, and it means a lot to me. Remember, camping is a very special place where feelings thrive, and quality food can help drive the journey between heart and mind. Go safely, but enjoy the ride. The following is my favourite recipe for a fun and flavourful camping potato, even if you have nowhere left to go.

Step 1: go camping
Step 2: build a wicked fire (piled high)
Step 3: drink 2 beers
Step 4: consider that all of our worldly existence may simply be the lucid fever dream of a restless god
Step 5: rub some big-ass potatoes in olive oil and wrap those spud-buds up in tin foil
Step 6: lay those nice little fellas in a cozy spot by the coals
Step 7: set timer for 20 minutes
Step 8: drink 2 beers
Step 9: think about how rivers operate with such a wild and reckless disrespect for authority
Step 10: flip them spuds
Step 11: set timer for 20 minutes
Step 12: get some bacon going in your favourite frying pan, you sweet little iron chef of a thousand stoves
Step 13: throw some chopped onion and garlic in there with the bacon, because feelings need feeding on this floating rock as it flushes through the vast emptiness of space
Step 14: pee for 4 minutes
Step 15: drain bacon in the river and offer a solemn and respectful salute to the aquatic life below for the temporary upgrade of water flavour and feel
Step 16: flip
Step 17: set timer for 20 minutes
Step 18: drink 2 beers
Step 19: chop up bacon-onion-garlic mix and chuck that shit into a fun food bowl
Step 20: pull potatoes from the fire and let them cool down for a few
Step 21: drink the rest of your wife's wine
Step 22: cut a half-centimetre hat off each potato and scoop out the sweet soft innards into the food bowl mix
Step 23: slap heaping scoops of sour cream, cream cheese, grated cheese, and spicy ranch into that bad-boy, plus hand-crush a few chips in there, like doritos, or all-dressed, or any pringle style (hickory sticks also work)
Step 24: stir together with vigorous abandon
Step 25: spoon your delicious party mix back into the potato shells
Step 26: lovingly bless a bunch more cheese and crumbled chips on top and wrap those festive friends back up in foil, you sweet little camping astonishment of hope
Step 27: get them back by the coals, you tastefully gracious gym avoider
Step 28: set timer for 10 minutes
Step 29: drink the leftover water from the vase of your flowerless dreams
Step 30: pull potatoes, unwrap, let cool for 3, then toast your victory with friends and family

I hope you enjoyed this episode of Cooking With Colin, where the flavours always boil!

Please don't eat the foil.

-CWP

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